Myrtle Beach barkeep is rockin’ around the Christmas tree

December 18, 2013 

Jess Ross at Malibu's Surf Bar at Broadway at the Beach in Myrtle Beach. Photo by Mandy Rodgers for Weekly Surge.

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    Jess Ross

    Malibu’s Surf Bar, 1320 Celebrity Circle CS-6, Myrtle Beach. 444-3500

    SIGNATURE DRINK | Pants Party Shot (Malibu Rum, melon, amaretto, and pineapple juice)

QUESTION | What’s on your Christmas list this year?

ANSWER | A nice mountain home.

Have you been naughty or nice?

I’m always nice.

Do you have a fireplace at your house? I do, with a remote.

How does Santa get into homes without fireplaces? He’s magical, I’m not sure, but my dad always said Santa would throw pepper in your eyes if you were awake when he got there, so I was always fast asleep.

Do you think Santa has a big belly from all the cookies he eats on Christmas Eve, because Mrs. Claus is such a good cook, or because of a thyroid problem? Milk and cookies can’t be slimming.

What is your favorite ornament on your Christmas tree? Some craft ones my mom made when I was a kid...they look like a mangy Santa and angels in nighties, “Santa and his hos.”

Do you go for a real Christmas tree, or artificial? Since my daughter was convinced Christmas trees aren’t real because we did artificial, we are going real this year.

On the First Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, a partridge in a pear tree - what did he give me on the 9th Day? (Without cheating and using Google.) Nine ladies dancing?

What is your favorite Christmas song? “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree.”

If you added another verse to the song, “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas,” what three things would you include that remind you that Christmas is on its way? Bells for pocket change, crowded shopping malls, Christmas lights hung everywhere.

What would your reindeer name be? Goofy.

If you could rewrite history, what animal would you have lead Santa’s sleigh? A baboon (red nose...red butt.)

Mandy Rodgers, for Weekly Surge

Mandy Rodgers, for Weekly Surge

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