Myrtle Beach area’s kookiest crimes

For Weekly SurgeFebruary 19, 2014 

Better Call Saul! … Or Not

You think he would have represented himself if the case had gone to trial?

On Feb. 7, Florence attorney William J. Rivers III entered a guilty plea in federal court to mail fraud, according to a press release from U.S. Attorney Bill Nettles, district of South Carolina.

Between October 2006 and November 2012, Rivers and his partner, John L. Schurlknight, of the Florence personal injury law firm Schurlknight & Rivers P.A. defrauded 100 of their clients of more than $3.3 million, the release stated.

Twenty-four of those clients were defrauded directly by Rivers, at a loss of approximately $1.25 million.

This Saul Goodman-esque attorney settled personal injury cases and simply didn’t tell his clients, the release stated. He also didn’t pay medical providers with the settlement proceeds, leaving those he was supposedly representing with thousands of dollars in medical bills for the treatment they received.

What happened to the money? The firm kept it all.

Over the course of the investigation, Schurlknight committed suicide, the release stated.

The maximum penalty Rivers can receive is a fine of $250,000 and/or 20 years in jail.

We don’t know if this firm’s ad was on the back of the phone book, but we certainly won’t go that route if we find ourselves hit by some speed demon who just ran a red light.

People Still Have These?

We sure loved playing with pellet guns … when we were about 10.

But we got over that love around the time our voices got deeper and we got that “funny feeling” whenever we saw a pretty girl.

Apparently, these dudes are just kids at heart.

On Feb. 6, an officer with Coastal Carolina University’s police division found a vehicle parked in the middle of Founders Drive and stopped to investigate, according to an incident report.

While talking to the driver and the passenger, the officer could reportedly smell marijuana. A search of the vehicle was done, and the officer found a pellet gun, the report stated.

The gun was seized and the two were issued warnings and released. The incident was referred to the university’s student conduct process.

And again … pellet gun.

911 is a joke?

We would be lying if we said we never prank called the operator when we were kids.

We’ve since grown out of that phase. This man could have taken a lesson from us.

Conway man Tommy Lee Watts was arrested Feb. 7 for threatening the life of an Horry County Sheriff’s Deputy, according to a press release.

The incident happened on Jan. 27, when Watts reportedly called Horry County 911 and threatened to kill the deputy that was at his house attempting to serve an arrest warrant.

Watts was not at home when the deputy arrived, the release stated. His wife called him to let him know law enforcement was there. That’s when Watts told the 911 operator he was heading home and would kill the deputy if he laid a hand on his wife and didn’t leave his house.

Yep, this was definitely a case where a better choice of words would have been smart. Or, better yet, saying nothing at all was a viable option. Borrowing from Ron White; he had the right to remain silent, but he lost the ability.

We Laugh Because We’ve All Been There

This could have been any one of us wannabe chefs. Thankfully, our futile attempts in the kitchen didn’t end with a clearing of the building.

On Jan. 29, Coastal Carolina University officers and local firefighters responded to the Woods Residence Halls because of a fire alarm, according to an incident report.

Officers talked to the person living in the apartment where the alarm originated. It turns out the alarm was triggered because of smoke that accumulated by whatever the individual was cooking, the report stated.

Thankfully, no fire was found, no one was hurt and everyone was allowed back in to the building.

As for this “top chef,” we admire your culinary ambitions. But sometimes, it doesn’t hurt to phone Domino’s.

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